Gary Rinsem

A Third For A Time

A journal which remembers someone important to us.

Not like First Fourth, I'm doing it by accident and for fun while I hope to find my next love. The problem is, I'll never find her this way.

A thousand or more dating profiles, a thousand or more rejects. A hundred or so possibles who lied about even the basics, in their very first message! Didn't you read your own profile? Did you really think I wouldn't notice the differences between the facts claimed in your profile vs. your messages?

That doesn't count the truly loony women. The one in Prescott still gives me the shivers to think of her. Nobody wears patchouli because it stinks! Make up a religion and tell yourself you're a supernatural being from another dimension, but do it without me. She understood what lies would get me to drive to Prescott.

First Fourth was a true third. Writing that was fun. It's strange to be simulating the life she loved, just to enjoy a bit of the life BB and I shared. The three girl couples I've played third to have been great. Still having fun with numbers. They remind me a bit of BB, but it's time to get serious about love. There's strangeness writing that, while seeing three women in their 20's. Completely wrong for me and for them. Yet it's so much fun.

FF was an eye opener. She taught us there's a wider range to people's identity than anything ever mentioned in all of human culture. Our First Fourth understood who she was and being herself made her happy.

To be myself I need to find my life's fifth true love. I fear it's too much to hope for another love like that. I'll just keep playing around with women too young for love until the right one shows up. Three dating sites seems to provide a never ending stream, no a raging river of women... a little computer ding plays with each new message... its fantastic.