Gary Rinsem

New Years Morning
January 1, 2022

My norm, a new journal on day one of a new year...

January 1, 2022

The year is 2022, it's January 1st and as always I'm starting a new journal entry. It's been many months since my last new journal. Not that I've had nothing to write about, (which I haven't) it's more because I'm too bored to write. Should I bore myself by writing about the new TV that failed after two months? It's scheduled for replacement, but will take two weeks... I guess, the only item worth mention is the surprise that I'm still alive. A year ago today I didn't believe I'd be alive today. The end of August my Wegeners flair took a downward turn, from a point of continually worsening for nine months. By mid September it seemed clear that it was not going to kill me as soon as expected. So here I am... playing with unimpressive new technology. I've recently bought more crap than anyone needs, just to play with it. A mini desktop PC that'll nearly fit in a shirt pocket. It's doing well as a sacrificial machine, to use for risky things that I wouldn't do with a computer I care about. Also, I recently bought a stupid little plug to turn the lamp on and off by voice command. I suppose it's convenient if nothing else, but I'm waiting on four more. Don't know what I'll do with them, but all five only cost about 15 bucks... one will turn off the mini PC so I can restart it without getting out of bed. So that's it. Very boring. Love... it's still missing from my life... the only thing I've ever wanted... last New Years Day I cried all day trying to write about them... not doing that this year... I give up... I can't write what I want to write... Old website? I haven't chosen a language to learn this year. Last Jan 1st I was waiting to start studying HTML, CSS and Javascript, so I could write a jukebox to put on my crappy "New Google Sites" faux website. Three days studying the languages followed by three weeks messing with it, and I had a jukebox. Big deal... Mid summer I gave up on the faux website and decided to do a real site. Bought the domain "" because it was Loree's pick from a list of choices I gave her. She didn't know the crunchy hair story. New website? After six months work, it's still only on my LAN. I haven't picked a server because It's not ready. Over two hundred pointless pages all stem from the desire for communicaiton with Tami... ooops, not going there today... it hurts too much... crying now, after only that one brief thought... bye-bye...
February 2, 2022

It's Saturday, it's the third one in February. It's our 39th wedding anniversary. It's 12 hours old and all I've done is cry. BB... I died with you... and that's all I'm writing about it this year. Love you... bye-bye...
April 17, 2022

Ten years ago today.... I had a large group of specialist doctors working together trying to save my life. Ten years ago today they gave up and told me to "Transition to Hospice care." It was their expectation that I'd only live a few more days, or possibly a couple of weeks.